a few final things

1. geoff emailed me all yesterday to inform me that he had a scheduling snafu and will not, in fact, be able to attend my defense because he's in seattle. i think this is, on balance, good news, but am not yet sure.

2. have found four (4) mistakes so far in the 2 papers combined, none of them horrendous, but all displeasing to the eye. had an extended discussion with daniel in chipotle over lunch about whether to come right out and admit that i'm a moron, or brazen it out and hope they don't notice. therapy happened, and i got some good advice, and actually managed to feel more or less ok for about 15 minutes.

3. the anxiety is a horror. i feel, in my heart of hearts, that i have not prepared enough, will never have prepared enough.

4. to myself:

"Oft expectation fails, and most oft there
Where most it promises; and oft it hits
Where hope is coldest, and despair most fits."

(all's well that ends well)

(i hope)