Oh, and the packing foam is gone.

Over lunch at Elmo's, Han invited me to spend a week with him in Kuching, Sarawak, in his little bucolic abode. It will be fun, he says. We'll go trekking and have the blood sucked out of us by leeches and make tiramisu and go and eat laksa and generally be indolent and unproductive. It sounds tempting, but some of the other Singaporeans are going which is rather a disincentive. Besides, I'm going to be communing with nature for the next 4 months following break, so I figure I'd better get my bi-annual dose of Metropolitan life while I can.

Very sleepy through most of today because of staying late at Jeremy's Christmas party last night. Betsy loved the lava lamp, and Simon gave me a voucher for Waldenbooks. He originally bought me Neil Gaiman's Good Omens, which I read way back in Sec 4, and had to return it after craftily eliciting that information from me in an IM conversation on Tuesday. I told him that the gift was perfect, and that it's kind of difficult to shop for books for me because I do tend to have read them (especially if it's something I'll obviously like). Other presents included: oatmeal raisin cookies and beer, an (intentionally) bad DVD ("The Punisher"), earrings, a Playboy bartending book, Jose Cuerva tequila, body lotion, shot glasses and a Curious George mug.

Anyway, aforesaid sleepiness led to rather low productivity in terms of studying and packing, although it's kind of OK because there isn't a whole lot of studying left to do. As a matter of fact, I'm feeling kind of guilty because everyone else is piled nose high in textbooks while I'm prancing the halls making fun of them. Bad me.

and no one knows
(tiddly pom)
how cold my toes
(tiddly pom)
how cold my toes
(tiddly pom)
are growing

~ a. a. milne

I really don't need 50 e-mails a day telling me to buy Vicodin, thank you very much.

And, on an entirely unrelated note, shout-out to the first responder to my Nov 27th request.

Last day of classes. Last day of bio tutoring. Returned access card for BIAC. Bittersweet. Weather very dreary and bitingly cold.

Finally confirmed that Dr. McCarthy's done his work and submitted my things.

There are a lot of little white bits of packing foam in my room that have blown all over the place. Only vaguely festive thing around at the moment.

Threw away an accumulation of 2.5 years of junk today with a mixture of nostalgia and despair. The human propensity to hoard things is simply amazing. I have no idea how I'm going to make it in terms of packing space, and if I go overweight on my suitcases again I'm going to cry. Last summer that happened to me, and I stood there unpacking in the airport lobby, stuffing things into plastic bags to bring on as carry-on items while everyone looked on thinking who's this crazy Asian buffoon who doesn't even know how to pack a suitcase.

Many abortive attempts at "Carol of the Bells" later, I'm convinced that the song was just not meant to be sung.

Found this while clearing out freshman year stuff:

"My Lord God
I have no idea where I am going
I do not see the road ahead of me
I cannot know for certain
where it will end
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that
I think I am following your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so
But I believe that the desire to please you
does in fact please you.

And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything
apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this
you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore I will trust you always
though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear,
for you are ever with me,
and you will never
leave me to face my perils alone."

Thomas Merton

yes when you start jumping around in the halls you have decidedly had Too Much Caffeine

Physically went to Dr. McCarthy's office to see what's going on with my recommendations. Out of town. His secretary says that they are on his to-do list, meaning that they might or might not be to-done. On top of that, Dr. Buhusi just emailed me to say that the Harvard online recommendation thing has not been sent to him, despite the fact that I sent it out twice. I could cry. It's like my undergrad applications all over again. Why can't life ever be simple?

Free coffee week is wreaking havoc with my nerves as usual, despite the fact that I have nothing in particular to be stressed about. Little things are bugging me. Justin sent an Amazon.com order to me without asking if I would transport it for him...as if I don't have enough stuff to carry back over winter break already. Devils' Duplicates is bereft of boxes for me to use as shipping containers for books. There seems to be rheumatic pain or something in my right instep.

Chris is gone, spirited away by a taxi at a time of night when sensible people should be asleep and not hurrying to the airport. His leaving brings about the advent of exam week, which, for me, is going to be far more relaxing than it historically has been. I'm well ahead of the game with my papers - in fact, my main preoccupation is going to be the vexing question of what to do with all my stuff. I honestly feel like putting everything out in the corridor and having a huge jumble sale.

On the university front, Dr. McCarthy is missing without a trace, and goodness knows what he's done with my recommendations. Minz continues to message me twice a day to get frantic about her personal statements. It's a wonder any of us get into graduate school at all. Or maybe we don't. The process seems to weed disorganized people out just by virtue of its very nature.

Movies:
Pulp Fiction
Reservoir Dogs

went to northgate mall with chris to search for a gift for rhythm and blue's "secret santa" party next week. looked at a stained glass triptych, a dancing hamster that sings "tequila", a desk clock, hello kitty slippers and tacky hallmark merchandise before settling on a lava lamp for $9.99 (just under the budget). pleasantly surprised to find such a bargain since i always thought that lava lamps cost at least 30 bucks. resisted temptation to buy a used video game costing $14.95. walked back to east campus in the freezing cold.

Metaphysics
I was talking about blogging with Chris on the bus back from Chapel Hill yesterday. I asked him if he still read this blog; he said that he used to but doesn't really follow it anymore. We then started wondering if there's anyone else out there in the world who keeps us with it. He thinks the odds are that at least one other person out there is reading this religiously; I decidedly do not. The only thing going for it is that I update it regularly, which is more than can be said of the Wasteland of dead blogs out there. On the other hand, it is obscure, makes plenty of references to things that would make no sense to anyone who doesn't know me, and is generally rather unentertaining. So...who's right? If you are reading this blog and do not know me personally, e-mail jzl@duke.edu and give me a shout. I won't think that you're extremely sad/stalking me, I promise. This is just to settle a debate.

Elsewhere, we had thanksgiving brunch in Han's apartment (with some chicken and lots of dessert) and thanksgiving dinner in House H (with lots of everything, including candied yams). So now, it's the whole post-prandial trytophan-induced soporific reverie of repleteness. Joy.

Happy Thanksgiving!

New look!

I mailed in my Johns Hopkins envelope today, which means that I'm done! Done, done, done!

Now all that remains is to wait for the rejection letters. Which I will receive days later than anyone else because they will be forwarded to Beaufort. What a suck.

Chris arrived safely a few hours ago. I showed him around a little bit and we got dinner with Gab and Waihay and watched some anime and now he's curled up asleep while I type manically away at a paper and my blog and some other miscellaneous writing.

The campus has quietened down considerably since yesterday, with people leaving for the Turkey Day Holidays. Exodus, with suitcases. I hate that. Cf. Parents' weekend.

Books:
The Sun Also Rises - Ernest Hemingway

Sick. Runny nose. Sore throat. Coughing up my lungs. Still, I insist on singing in our dorm concert. Ah well. One of the last times I get to sing with my group.

Chris comes tomorrow.

we didn't place in sojam, but it was totally worth going anyway. the other college groups weren't too much to speak of, but the professional show was amazing. andrew chiakin used a loop machine to do a one-man a cappella song, including vocal percussion. da vinci's notebook was hysterical. the amount of talent all these people have is awe-inspiring.

so, one weekend of gallivanting later, it's actually time to get down to some real work now. if my next few entries are short, it's because i'm doing some hardcore mugging.

Reason to hate Singapore #23987417

you know, it struck me, after reading a friend's blog, that i'm only going to be studying in durham for another 2.5 weeks. after that, singapore, then bermuda, then beaufort, then god knows where. should i be tearing up? i am strangely unmoved.

Despite having the clunkiest title for a movie this year, (thanks, Pat O'Brien) Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World actually does live up to its positive reviews. Best member of the cast: Paul Bettany for creating an incredibly sympathetic character out of the ship's doctor and Russell Crowe's main confidante. Kudos, all around, and my grudging hats off to a Russell Crowe movie that might once again beat out my Lord of the Rings in the Oscar race.

In other news, SoJam is tonight, and Speak of the Devil has somewhow wangled themsleves a full page article in The Chronicle detailing their elaborate preparation. Whatever, guys. It's called having fun. The whole festival is being held at a rather unfortunate time, because I really do have to get these papers of mine done before Thanksgiving (and Chris) descends. To hear Da Vinci's Notebook though? I'm willing to stay up long nights on subsequent days for that.